When your life is numbered by the platelet counts …

When Muslim all over the world celebrated the eidul adha, my family and I were fighting for our life. We were attacked by dengue and five of us including myself were hospitalized. I was hit the hardest with my platelet count was down to 9 (normal is 150++). It was painfully scary as the case was classified as fatal. In anytime my blood vessel could burst out and causes internal bleeding. So I was under ICU standby for the whole two days. Alhamd. Nothing bad happened. I hung on with prayers and hopes; and my body pulled it through until the WBC and the platelet count steadily increased. Funny when you are down with the fever; nothing matters except that you want to get better and be with your family and friends. I guess nothing else really matters….your high life, big career, cars, houses, positions or what not….you just never give them a thought when you were down and almost out. You would like to see your family and friends get in touch with you in case you would not make it this time. FYI, I survived the same ordeal last year about the same time. That’s the price we have to pay for moving to the big city such as Shah Alam. I guess now I know what Shah Alam is famous for : one big under-utilised National Stadium and another one is it is home to Dengue; sarang nyamuk Aedes. If not for pecah rumah, then the cerun runtuh otherwise dengue…..where else do we feel safe and sound for our little family.That’s life I guess…live it a day at a time and be thankful for all the things happened during that period of time.
My other family members : my wife and three of our children suffered high fever and were warded for a few days. I wish this tragic moment will not happen again. It was so hard for the children to cope even my wife and I were down to tears for being helpless and just could not do anything to ease the burden. We are thankful and proud of our second daughter Ifah who escaped the fever and at one time was the only one running around the ward taking care of the family. She is one strong lady. Very proud of her. We are also thankful to the neighbors who helped out during this difficult time. And family back home who held prayers for our recovery.
As death was just a-platelet-count away, your minds stormed with people and faces that you wish to see and meet for the last time. Maybe just to say that last word that you hold up for so many years. You flip through the faces as if looking at an album for people you come to know all these years. Suddenly you stop and mark a few faces as if you would come back to them later. What if there is no LATER ! Your life might stop right there and then…and there is no more later. When I realized how precious that extra time is I felt so small and vulnerable. I could not even control my own life…it’s not even mine.

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